Tuesday, May 31, 2011

back to december -by ela-

sumpah gue nangis woy baca ini-_-


Back to December

I'm so glad you made time to see me
How's life, tell me how's your family?
I haven't seen them in a while

I’ve been alone for along time. I had no one to talk with or be together. It was like the whole world had shunned me. I knew why, I always knew. I really regretted it. My life was like hell, and I accepted it. I deserved it because the way I treated her.

I sighed and stood up. I grabbed my jacket and combed my hair. I’m going to meet her today.

I drove my car to the café we used to go together. I got out from my car and glanced nervously to the café’s window. There she was, drinking her coffee without her eyes from her Blackberry. I walked towards the café and approached her.

“Hallo, Jacob. Long time no see,” she said flatly when I stood next to her. Her tone felt like a knife stabbed to my heart. I cleared my throat.

“Hello, Silvia. Good to see you,” I said and took a seat in front of her. As I sat, she put her Blackberry and looked to me eyes. God, I couldn’t stand her beautiful green eyes.

“I see that your business is fine,” I tried to make conversation.

“Yeah, well, many wealthy families bought my paintings. I never like them though,” she answered.

“And how’s your family? It’s been-“I stopped before I could talk about it. I noticed that she sensed it and quickly she changed the subject.

“So, what is it you want to talk about?” she said slowly.

You've been good, busier than ever
We small talk, work, and the weather
Your guard is up and I know why

“I… I want to… I want to say sorry,” I said. She just stared at me blankly. “I’m sorry Via,” I said.

She didn’t say a word. I felt distraught. If she yell or scream or maybe hit me with the porcelain cup, I felt more comfortable. She kept staring at me and I could see deep sadness in her eyes. It really hurt. The thing really hurt me the most is, I’m the one who made her sad.

“Via, say something,” I pleaded.

“What should I say?” she answered.

“Anything you want. Scream it if you want,” I said.

I saw her eyes started to fill with tears. The memory flashed to my mind, as it always happened.


Because the last time you saw me
It still burned in the back of your mind
You gave me roses and I left them there to die 


It was December night, a week before New Year. I entered the American restaurant A&W and sat with my girl, Julie. She smiled at and kissed my cheek. I felt a bit weird when she did that, but I ignored it. I fed her a spoon of ice cream. Suddenly, someone showered me with a glass of rootbeer. When I looked up, I saw Silvia’s furious face glaring at me.

“Via-“I started but she slapped me.

“How dare you cheat on me, you heartless bastard!” she shouted. Peoples started to stare at us.

“Via, I could explain-“

“How many more girls do you have, huh? Three? Four?”

“No, I-“

“You know what, I don’t need you! I want to break up!” she said with a final tone. She ran out from the café, but I managed to stop her.

“Via, please don’t end our relationship. I’m sorry, it’s just-“

“Let go off me!” she screamed and yanked my hand. She glared at me.

“I don’t want you to come to me and talk to me! Don’t you dare to show your face to me! I’m done with you!” she spat and ran to her car.

(end of flashback)

So this is me swallowing my pride
Standing in front of you
Saying I'm sorry for that night
And I go back to December all the time

Slowly with trembling hands, I embraced her and let her laid her honey-brown head on my shoulder. She sobbed against my chest and I felt really sorry for her. I stroked her hair gently and kissed her forehead.

It turns out freedom 
ain’t nothing but missing you
Wishing that I realized what I had when you were mine
I go back to December, turn around and make it all right
I go back to December all the time

“Jack, I-“

“It’s okay if you don’t want to forgive me. But just don’t leave me. Don’t you run away from me. You could scream at me, shun me, hit me or even kill me, but don’t you ever leave me. You don’t know how it tortures me,” I said to her ears. It was a request, not an order.

“You hurt me so deep, Jack. Part of me wants to forgive you, part of me wants to kill you,” she whispered. I could feel my tears wet with her tears.

These days I haven't been sleeping
Staying up playing back myself leaving
When you birthday passed
And I didn't call 

“I miss you so much, Via. I really want to call you, but I don’t have the guts to do that. I spent two day to decide whether I should call you or not when it was your birthday. A coward I am.”

She just stayed silent and played with my collar. She was thinking, I knew. I remembered that gesture every time she was deep in thought. She pulled apart and sat straight. I watched how the sunlight enlighten her beautiful face and her blonde hair framed her face perfectly.

Then I think about summer, all the beautiful times 

I watched you laughing 

From the passenger side 

And I realized I loved you in the fall 

The memory flashed into my mind when we spent summer together. We went to the beach and I watched her playing with the sand. I lifted her from the ground and threw her gently to the water. I really loved the moment when both of us slept on the beach, watching the sky and named every star we knew.

And then the cold came, the dark days
When fear crept into my mind
You gave me all your love
And all I gave you was goodbye

Unfortunately, the memory when I hurt her also came into my mind. I broke up with Julie as soon as Silvia ran to her car and left me. I never dated any girls since then. I had closed myself from everyone for years. She never knew that, and she didn’t need to know.


I miss your tan skin, your sweet smile
So good to me, so right
And how you held me in your arms
That September night
The first time you ever saw me cry

Jacob never knew how hurt I am when he cheated on me. There were times when all I could do is crying and crying. I really missed him, everything in him. I missed his beautiful smile and his brown hair. Everything we had together is the best memory I had.


“Via, I understand you need time to think about forgiving me. Just don’t leave me, okay?” he said with smile.

He kissed my cheek and stood up. He walked towards the door and stopped to wave at me. He stuck out his tongue and I chuckled. I waved back at him and looked away. Suddenly, I heard a loud horn and a horrible bang. Screaming voices rang on my ears. I turned around in a slow motion and found Jacob lying on the ground, blood surrounding his brown hair.

I ran out from the café towards him. I felt tears falling from my eyes as I pushed people aside. As I approached him, quickly knelt on the ground and put his head on my lap. I saw blood dripping from his mouth and my skirt stained with his blood. His eyes closed and he was breathing shortly. I could feel his pulse fainting.

Maybe this is wishful thinking
Probably mindless dreaming
But if we loved again I swear I'd love you right

“No… Jacob, don’t leave me!” I started to cry. He opened his eyes and smiled weakly.

“I’m so glad to see you in my last minute of living, Silvia,” he whispered softly. I heard people started to call for help.

“You’re not going to die, Jack! People are going to help you. Please, don’t leave me. I’m not letting you go now,” I sobbed. He stroked my cheek and I almost flinched when I felt his hand as cold as an ice.

“Oh, I never leave you Via. I’m always with you in your heart,” he said as tears falling from his own eyes. He touched the my chest, where my heart beating madly.

“Please Jack… Don’t talk like this... Stop… Don’t say goodbyes... You’re going to live…” I whispered.

“I’ll be the sunshine on your hair, I’ll be the whisper in the wind…”

“Jack, please stop… I can’t give you up now…” I said held his head tightly, as if it would prevent him from dead.

I'd go back in time and change it but I can't
So if the chain is on your door, I understand 

“Via my dear, please don’t worry about me. I’m going to be just fine. I’ll be in your dreams. I’ll be the beat of your heart, the moonlight shining down. I’ll be with you until the end, my love. I never regret everything I had with you. The only thing I regret is hurting you,” he said. I leaned and kissed him.

“Please, I can’t leave without you…” I whispered. He stroked my cheek again.

“Let me go, Via and I promise I’ll always be with you. I’ll never give you up… Never…” he whispered faintly. Then, his eyes closed and his hand fell to the ground.

“Jack, wake up… Oh no, don’t you leave me… Wake up Jack!” I screamed. I shook him roughly, hoping that he’ll wake up and said that he was just kidding.

But, no, he is dead. He would never wake up again. I had waste five years for thinking. If I could go back in time, I would say yes on the café already. And this would never happen. Maybe, I said yes, I could be with him and filled our last days together. He would smile for me and cheered me up. I’ll do that all the time until death separated us. I stroked his brown hair and kissed him.

“I will always love you till the end, my morning sunshine…” I whispered to his ears.

All the time...


crazy girls-_-

masa ya masatadi tuh pas ada yang remed science, gue diandra lisa chloudya nina kan duduk bareng kan. trus gue sama nina kan ngadep ke belakang kan supaya ngobrolnya enak sama yang lain, ehh truss......nina masa tbtb kyk ngomong sendiri ke arah wastafel gitu kan._. kita kan bingung kan-_- trus dari sinilah bermulai nya-_- garagara nina gituu, kita jadi langsung kyk ngikut2 ngomong sama wastafel juga kan(emang dasar semuanya gila-_-) trus nina bilaang "yaah, dianya udah mau pergi" trus udahkan dieem, eeh nina tbtb ngomong lagii "eh ehhhh itu ada yang lain yang dateeng" trus gue bilang "sana lis bukain pintunya" eeh kesana lah lisa bukain pintu. lisa "ehh mana nin? kok gak adaa? *nyari2 diluar* eeeh itu diaa!! *sambil ngeliat ke bawah, trus di bawa ke tempat kita sambil kyk dicubit lehernya gitu kyk kucing*" trus kita bilang itu JENGLOT kan WAKAKAKAKK dan padahal tuh invisible gitu looh-_- imajinasi kita emang udah ketinggian ya(?) truus kan ceritanya si jenglotnya mau pergi jemput pacarnya dulu di paris coba (apaanbangeet-______-) trus kan kita gendong gitu kan kita anter jenglotnya keluar. eeeh truus ceritanya nih ya si jenglot dan si pacar jenglot udah dateng kan. truss kita ketawaketiwi segala maceem, truus ceritanya si mereka nya kyk pen balik gitu kan, trus kan kita anterin keluar lagi kan-_- dan kita tuuh sampe kyk nangis2 gajelas kyk anak ilang-_- si lisa aja nyampe tidur2an gitu sambil ceritanya nangis-_- lebe oke gue tau kita emang lebe parahx_x truus kan udah pergii ehh siapa gitu gue lupa ada yang bilaang "waah wah! ADA JUMBO DATEENG! *sambil ngegoyang2in meja kyk gempa gitu*"  trus kita ya mulai ceritanya gila gitu kan ya sampe kita ada yg pura2 ketampar betisnya(?) dikelitikin sama si jumbo. oiyaa, kita namainnya JUMBOOO;D truus ya si nina tbtb bilang "ehehh ciee diandra dicium jumboo" kitasemua "CIEE DIANDRAA WIHII CONGRAATS YAA LONGLAAAASTT!!;D" trus kita jadi mulai ngejek2 diandra-jumbo-_- trus kan kita kyk pengen ngeluarin jumbo gitu kan dari kelas garagara dia ganggu gitu kan, truuus kita tuh kyk gotong royong gitu ngeluarin dia dari kelas dan pokoknya kebeeratan bgt gitu kan ya-_- dan dan dan daaaan tadi kan di kelas kan yang ada kan pak zaki kan, trus pak zaki tuh kayak ngeliatin kita ketawa2 terus kan-_- trus pas lunch gitukan gue ngantri belakang beliau *eaa asik beliau-_-* trus dia bilang, "eeh tadi tuh kalian kenapaa?" gue "gakpapa kalii pak" pz "bapak tuh cuma takut satu apa tau gak? bapak tuh takut punya murid yang gila" gue *kurang ajar gue dikatain gila-_-* trus ya kan pas lagi meeting buat class meeting, gue kan males gitu kan, alhasil gue minta meidy nyabut satu rambutnya kan-_- trus rambut itu gue sambungin ke rambut meidy yang masih nempel ame palanye-_- trus kan gue tambain lagi pake rambut gue sama rambut yang lain kan trus itu tuh udah kyk rambut rapunzel asal lo tau ya-_- dan anehya, rambut yang panjang itu cuma satu helai coba.malu2in nusa bangsa dan negara bangetdehx_x(?) yagitulah ya pokoknya kita gila banget deh, apalagi gue-_- sekian dan terimakasih.

Friday, May 20, 2011


HAPPY BIRTHDAAAY MOOOM!!! WOHOOO(´˘з˘) wish you nothing but the best!♥ you're older than yesterday but younger than tomorrow! may your birthday filled with excitement, joy, and laughter! may each and every passing year bring you wisdom, peace and cheer. may this day bring to you all things that make you smile!

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wml o:)

masa ya masa besok senen gue ehb AAAA щºщsomebody call 911!!!(?) doain gue ya doain supaya ngerjain nya lancaar, oahasilnya bagus nilai2nya baguuus, NAIK KELAS AMIIIN. juga buat semua anak2 trd goodluuuck classmates. iloveyouuu{}
btwbtw, masa ya tadi kan di sekolah dan main truth or dare. trus gue kena kan nih, ya gue milih dare kan. EH TRUUUS........masa gue disuruh salim sama f.a.r.i.z.a┌П┐-_- h dan main trus ya kan udah ya blablabla eeeh trus gue kena lagi trus gue milih dare lagikaan, eeeeeh sekarang-_- disuruh nepok punggungnya fariza LAGI 2 kali coba lo bayangin gue udah jijik kea apaantau gitudah kan ya-_- trus ya gue benciiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii bgt pas praktek agama kan sholat apagitudeh kan trus sholatnya kan yg cewek pake mukena kan trus itu tuh kita sholatnya di tempat yg panaaaaaaaaaaaaaaas subhanallah so damn hot deh ya pokoknya. trus gue jadinya kan gabisa konsen kan. eeh, yg christian enaak bgt prakteknya di tempat dingin gitu trus mereka kan ga perlu pake mukena kan jadinya tuh enaak parah gitu-_- truuus gue kan emang paling gasuka yg panas2 gitu kan trus nyampe kelas beeehh...surga pisan dah dingin gicuuuu(˘_˘") sekian dulu ya byee!  


Saturday, May 14, 2011

7 graderss\m/

heyheyy berhubung gue lg boceeen dan gak pengen galoo mulu, gue nge post tentang temen2 kelas gue aja yak. enjoyyyy.....

Intan Karina Hapsari ƪƪ'▿')
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Intan. braces. smart. pretty. itu udah intan bgt deh ya. dia kalem gitu sih orangnya, tapi sekali gila.....subhanallah gue gak kenal dia deh-_- oiya oiya, she's ma cousin! ini dia orang yg paling sering nguakakk bareng gue-_-

Desya Ayu Aghnia ƪƪ'▿')
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Desya. baiiiiiiik bgttt.cantik pula. tapi kita suka pura2 nyuekin satu sama lain gitu trus seru gitu kan ngacangin abis2an-_- trus akhir2 ini tuh kita duduk di kelasnya tuh berduaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa teruus hihii:$

Nina Aisha Darby ƪƪ'▿')
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Nina. buseet yak, ini anak orang atu cantiiik bgt subhanallah._. keder gue. trus baiiknyaa doong, baik parah parah parah bgt deh. dia tuh rada bule gitu gara2 bokapnya orang ostrali. dia tuh kalo lagi gila, kita2 manggil dia bugil (bule gila-_-)

Diandra Rizki ƪƪ'▿')
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Diandra. kalem. sekali ketawa, ngakak gabisa berenti-_- trus ketawa nya tuh lucu gitu. oiya dulu dia tuh tinggal di jerman 10 taun dari umur 1 dan dia tuh kalo ngomong kyk masih ada logat2 jerman gitu-_- dasar anak jerman-_-

Chloudya Julia Siboro ƪƪ'▿')
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Chloudya. ehh nama dia sebenernya masih panjang boo-_- Chloudya Julia Emmanuelle Pretty Siboro. panjang bgt yak-_- dia tuh pinterr gituyaa trus baik pulaa. OIYA kasian deh dia, masa si bima tuh manggil dia geledek coba-_- grgr kan nama dia kan chloudya gitu kan trus suka dikata2in cloudy trus kan kalo cloudy, ujan. kalo ujan ada geledek gitu-_- bima suka lawak memang. biarlah itu nama panggilan sayang :$:$ (?)

Lisa Dara Marella ƪƪ'▿')
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Lisa. braces. math-aholic(?) buset yak ini anak tuh seneng bgt sama math...well gue juga deng ;b tapi dia tuh kyk gapernah bosen gitu sama math-_- gue mah kalo lg males ya maless(?) ehehh trus dia masa dipanggil indomie sama bima grgr rambutnya keriting. gapenting bgt ya bima-_-

Meidy Arisawan ƪƪ'▿')
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Meidy. HAAAA pasangan ngotis gue\m/ tapi otisan dia koook tetep. dia tuh ya bacooot tau-_- gapernah gituya kalem dikiit aja gapernah. tapi seruuuu gtiudeh pokoknya ni anak

Ela Sofiarti Sofian ƪƪ'▿')
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Ela. pinter ajigileee. tombooy diee. masa yg boys bilang kalo dia itu berkepribadian ganda, jadi bisa cewek bisa cowok WAKAKAKK candaa laa. dia kalo lg baik sih baik ya. tp kalo lg pukul2an sama cowok, sampe disabet pake rante coba sama dia-_-

Gwynne Medeline Sanger ƪƪ'▿')
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Gwynne. baik. dia kalo ketawa yg ngakak gitu sampe guling2 gitu deh-_- gwynne juga yaa...bisa dibilang tomboy juga lah, cuma gak setomboy ela._.

Muhammad Nafil Fadli ('▿'ʃʃ
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Fadli. heh ini cowok begimana ya......:/ alim gitudeh anaknya. trus baiik gitu. dari semua cowok, dia yg paling baiik. tapi kalo lg gila ya gila juga sih sampe gabisa berenti gitu-_-

Himawan Dhito ('▿'ʃʃ
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Dhito. INIII DIAAAAA GITARIS 7 ISTANBUUL *okeganyante. soalnya tuh ya dia kalo main gitar......aaaaaaaaa gue fly sendiri gitu gatau kenapa:/ gue emg kalo cowok sukanya yg main gitar sih. keren aja. tapi gue gasuka dia ya forsure-_____- i belong to someone already;b trus ya yg paling gue gasuka dari dhito itu cuma satu; EMOSIONAL. sensi bgt gitudeh. diejek dikit doang, ngambek marah gitu. padahal hobinya ngejek2 orang, giliran diejek aja, behh._-

Bima Nugroho ('▿'ʃʃ
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Bima. percaya atau engga............dia itu DRUMMER :O:O dan asal lo tau ya, dia itu keciiiiiiiiiil bgt tau *bukan rasisya. tapi emg bener-_- tapi keren deh kalo dia main drum. CAHBOCAHBOCAHBOCAH;b;b;b dia mahoo looh. candaa ye bimbiimms~

Fariza Julio ('▿'ʃʃ
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Fariza. dia orangnya gimana ya....:/ baik deh iya baik. tapi kalo dia bete atau marah gitu, serem loooh-_- bingung ah gue ya kalo tentang jaja. oiyaa, dia tuh kita panggilnya jaja gituuu

Benny William Pardede ('▿'ʃʃ
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Benny. ba to thecot. itu cukup menjelaskan beliau. dia tuh ya bacooooootnya udh stadium akhir gitudeh. trus dia suka bgt jbjb orang lg ngomong trus ngocol gitu. tapi eh tapiii........dia JAGO SETENGAAH MATI MAIN PIANONYAAAA! kereeeeeeen bgtt deh dia mainnya. gak kebayang gue, seorang benny bisa sehebat gituu. oiyaoiyaaa benny baru pake braces looh. trus kan kita ceng2in terus kyk ngambek gitu ehehee maap kk._.

Yogi Poernama ('▿'ʃʃ
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Yogi. aliiiim bgt juga ini anak kyk fadli gitu. mereka berdua paling jarang telat kalo sholat o:) anak sholeh. yogi tuh juga baiiiik bgt gituya. tp kalo udh gaje, capedah gue-_-

Fathir Halilintar ('▿'ʃʃ
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Fathir. HAAAH dia itu ya hadehh capek ngurusinnya-_- susah bgt diatur. tapi dia jagooo bgt gambar. keren deh gambar2nya.trus ya dia tuh seruuu bgt kalo lg ngakak. mukanya langsung merah merona gituuu(?) trus gabisa berenti itu ketawanyaa-_- dia kan makanya banyak kan, jadi kalo bawa makan kan banyak kan, nah serunya kalo dia bagi2~~

overaaaaalll~ ya begitu ya anak2 trd punya kekurangan dan kelebihan masing2 *eaeaa:$ gitudeh ya pokoknya we looveeeeeeee each other even tho sometimees we fight._.

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Elegant Rose - Diagonal Resize 2